pLiZzZ hELP Me!!!

im in the state of unsure now...im x sure wif my own feelings...im x sure if im hurt, angry, happy or what...i jt cant think of the answer yet...i start to wonder y do i hv to face all this???i want my life back....i want the jovial ashairi back!!!i really mean it actually...i just want the moments i had last time come back...im x sure on how long must i endure n stand all this wait...am i stupid to feel like that???i just cant make myself comfortable everytime i have to face that person...i duno how long will we be like this...i want a life n moments i used to have back...y all this happens???y things cant be better???im x sure n i duno y....i want things get better but im x sure how n when...some ppl say let time decides but how long we hv to wait....how long can we stand all the suffer???i just cant do this...im x a gud actor though a pretender....i wanna cry but i cant...i just can say that be patient coz i dun hate that person...its just that i want time on my own...but i duno how much time do i need for myself???a day, a week, a month or a year or forever???history occurs n we learn tru mistakes...but y does it happen???im x sure n im still seeking for the answer...do help me frens...i cant think anymore...everyday i hv to wear mask so that ppl ard duno what happens...everyday i hv to pretend that im fine though im not...i cant bear all this...i need to get myself out of it...do help me God n everyone!!!

-im not sure if i can bear it any longer-